Monday, April 5, 2021

trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

I open my eyes slowly.

There’s no light around me.

Only darkness.


I put my hand in front of my face, but I can’t see it.


I wiggle my fingers, but I can’t see them.


Am I blind?


I am scared.


That’s for sure.


I’m afraid of the dark.


When I was a little boy, my abuelo taught me to do something very important when I wake up afraid in the dark.


"Little salt,” he whispered, "When you wake up and it's dark, Keep your eyes open, don’t even blink, and think, 'I am salt. I am light. I am made from the dust.' 


Think these words three time.


When you’re finish thinking them, everything will be okay. 


I promise."


I am salt. I am light. I am made from the dust.


I am salt. I am light. I am made from the dust.


I am salt. I am light. I am made from the dust.


My abuelo was right, as he mostly is.


I can see again.


Here is my hand.


Here are my wiggling fingers.


Here I am.




Sunday, April 4, 2021

trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

 He remembered when he was a little boy. 

He sat on a wooden stool in front of a broken window, and looked out at the rain falling in great sheets from the cloudy sky. 


His mamí stood behind him, her arms gently around his chest. 


"I love you," she whispered in his ear. 


Then she walked away and returned to her work cleaning their room and cooking their supper. 


In that moment, he knew that he was loved.


He knew he was able to love.

     

Simple kindness. 


He remembered when he was a teenager. 


He walked beside his papí in the late afternoon sun down a long row of tomatoes.


"Take my hand and come with me," said his papí. 


He took him to a tree and sat down with him under the shade of it’s giant branches. 


He took out a notebook, a notebook filled with words, beautiful words, powerful words, about people, about life, words he wrote but never spoke, for he was a quiet person who spoke a little and worked a lot. 


"These words are for you, my son," he said. 


Then he walked away and returned to his work weeding the plants and nurturing the tomato plants.. 


In that moment, he knew that his own thoughts and words were important. 


Simple kindness. 


He remembered when he was a young man. 


He sat at the foot of his bed. 


Gabby stood before him.


She lowered her dress to the ground. 


He saw her naked for the first time. 


He stared at her sonrisa, her smile.


It was as if the sun had risen on him. 


He stared at her brown skin.


It was as if the rich soil of the ground was before him. 


He stared at her body.


He couldn’t breathe for a long moment. 


It was as if all the beauty of the world settled around them.


Simple kindness.




Saturday, April 3, 2021

trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

 G - GULLAH

“Po lidda fella,” said the old, weathered woman with skin as dark and wrinkled as bark and arms as thin and knobby as branches on the farthest reaches of the ancient oak trees on the island.

She spoke with the flavor of her Gullah ancestors, who created a new language in the lowcountry of South Carolina from the far away coasts of West Africa.

        

Her ancestors did that by mixing the heart language they learned on their mothers’ knees with the English language they learned on the farms and fields of the people who had stolen them away from their own people and their own land.

        

She lived in a holey floored, crack walled, Duck taped shotgun style shack on John’s Island left over from the days of slavery and Jim Crow. 

        

She fished the inlet and the shoreline each morning, trying to catch red fish, sea trout and flounder to go with the fruits and vegetables from her garden. 

        

She wove sweet grass into baskets from late morning to early evening.

        

“Jus sits dere,” she continued, “Eva monin’ as de sun rises ova de ocean an sits on de wada like a ripe tomada.

        

Neva says a word. Jus sits dere a’watchin de wada and a’lis’nin to de waves.”

        

One day she walked over to him and stood beside him. 

        

Her shadow protected him from the bright sunshine and oppressive heat of the new day. 

        

“Wha’s yo name?” she asked kindly. 

        

“My name’s Mattie. Would you tell me yo name?”

        

He turned his earthy brown eyes to her. 

        

He didn’t say a thing. 

        

She figured he didn’t understand her. 

        

His mamí and abuelo were migrant workers, picking peaches and tomatoes in the lowcountry summers until moving down the coasts of Georgia and Florida with the southern winters.

        

“Ma’be he only speaks Spanish,” she thought, for his family came to the United States from the farms and fields of El Salvador.

        

Suddenly, he whistled. 

        

She was astonished. 

        

She almost fell over into the sand. 

        

The sound was unlike any whistle she had ever heard in her whole life.

        

A usual whistle has two notes and a high pitch, but this was an unusual whistle. 

        

It  had all kinds of notes in it, and the pitch went high and low, low and high, and all kinds of places in between. 

        

It was as if the great composers had written his whistle at the height of their compositional powers.

        

“Ya know, it was like he was a’tryin to say somepin to me in a be-yoo-tee-ful way,” she explained, “But I din’ hab no idée whad id was.”

        

He looked back over the water and at the sky again.

        

He was very still and very quiet. 

        

She felt a wide compassion for him in the deepest part of her heart. 

        

She wrapped her arm around his shoulder as the tide rolled in.

        

She placed her calloused hand on his head. 

        

“I be here,” she whispered, not exactly sure why.

        

“I be here.”




trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

We walked down the beach on the wet sand as the tide moved out toward the ocean. 

I held Zeke's hand, and we talked about sea things. 


"I didn't know jelly fish swam this close to the shore during the spring.


I bet that drift wood is as old as 'The Old Man and the Sea.’


I think a horseshoe crab's blood can be used to treat cancer."


"Look," exclaimed.


"What is it?” he asked.


I picked up a shell out of the deep, cool sand and held it in my open hand.


It was unlike any shell we had ever seen. 


There were two shells, one on the top and it's twin on the bottom, connected at the back, and clammed up tightly in the front.


"It's a clam!" I said.


"Is it alive?" he asked.


"I don't know," I answered. 


"Let's take a look and find out."


We took our shovel and made our way to the shore line where the water from the waves ran back to the sea. 


I dug a small hole.


Zeke scratched out a little trench.


We placed the clam into our hand-made sandy water habitat.


We sat quietly.


We watched intently.


Children played around us. 


Families swam in the surf. 


People relaxed in the sun.


Slowly, the clam opened and closed itself, almost imperceptibly, and left a small bubble to show us it was still alive.


"Did you see that? 


It's still living!"


"Wow, we did something nice for that clam," Zeke said. 


"I wonder what nice thing it's going to do for us? 


Maybe it'll make a pearl for us.”


The little clam gave us a pearl, not one we could hold in our hands but one we could hold in our hearts.


It reminded us of something we learned from the great Irish writer George Bernard Shaw. 


He wrote that in a world where the law of the ‘survival of the fittest’ is in effect, where only the strong survive, there is another law in effect, too, the law of the ‘survival of the kindest,’ where the smallest and most forgotten things in the world live out commitment, creativity and compassion (a life force) for the whole world and everyone and every living thing in it.


 Life is in that kindness.


We saw that kindness today. 


We were that kindness for the little clam.




Friday, April 2, 2021

trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

   W - WHALES

       “US to Dig Trench Along Mexican Border,” read the headlines in newspapers all across America. 

        The President of the United States signed an executive order that authorized the digging of the trench. 

        Work crews began digging the 800 foot wide, 800 foot deep trench today. 

        It will run from the Pacific Ocean to the Gulf of Mexico. 

        It will be filled with water from that ocean and gulf.

        “It’s going to be the most beautiful trench you’ve ever seen,” said the President at a press conference beside the olympic sized swimming pool at his resort in Mar-a-Lago, Florida. “Believe me, this trench will make America great again. Mexico will pay for it! It will give great exercise to the people who try to swim across it. For the first time in history, you will have a President who will keep America safe from the huddled masses swimming to breathe free, and those huddled masses in tremendous shape! Better shape than what they came here in.”

        “It’s going to be a muddy eyesore,” responded the leader of the opposition to the trench. “The only thing muddier is the thinking of people who want to dig trenches to keep hurting people out of the United States.”

        “Really. The President is making America great again by making it safe for the first time in history, and making it safe again my making it great for the first time in history. Really,” wrote an ally of the President in an editorial in the Washington Post supporting the trench.

        Somewhere between the Pacific Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico, there is a whale.            Scientists call this whale 52 Blue because it sings it’s whale song at a frequency of 52 Hz. 

        Other whales can’t hear it’s song.

        They sing at frequencies between 15 and 25 Hz.

        Who is 52 Blue? 

        What kind of whale is it?

        When was it born?

        Where did it come from and where is it going?

        Why does it sing at an unhearable frequency?

        We don’t know. We know so little.

        Could it be a deformed blue whale? 

        Could it be a cross between a blue whale and a fin whale? 

        Could it be a new kind of whale we have only heard but never seen in the deep, wide sea.

        A small, mute migrant boy from El Salvador and a brave, brilliant Alaskan Iñuit girl are on their way to try to find 52 Blue.




trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

 how to be a saint

who you are

and what you do

make you a saint


If people are sick

bring home-cooked meals to them,

do their work for them,

even though you’ve worked all day yourself


If people fall on hard times

make anything yours theirs

If they need a drink of something strong,

or a long hour of listening, be there 


the dirt and blisters

on your hands


the sweat

across your forehead


the prayers

deep in the night


the smiles

in the early morning


make you the who and what

of love




Thursday, April 1, 2021

trevor’s encyclopedia of lost things

the human face

hope,

faith,

love,

simply 

being.


the human face 

eyes

heart

tears

simply

seeing


brown eyes

filled with kindness


soft smiles

filled with sunrises


turn

tenderly

kiss

the cheek

of the human face

and whisper,

Estoy aquí,

I’m here.